What to do About Overwhelm

Life, and especially motherhood, offers up plenty of opportunities for the big “O” to take the wheel. The big “O” being overwhelm!

Feeling overwhelmed is both a mental and a physical experience. When we perceive an event or set of events as more than we can handle, our “fear sensor” in our brain literally activates and sounds the alarm throughout our bodies.

For some this can even become so severe and trigger panic attacks or anxiety, others depression, but it’s no doubt the struggle is real!

1. Find Something to Appreciate

PRACTICE:  For a few moments, stop obsessing over how much you still have to do, and appreciate how much you’ve already done. Switch your perspective from thinking of all the things you “have to do” and instead shift to thinking about what you “get to do” and why. 

• EXAMPLE: I have soooo much laundry.
  SWITCH: I am grateful that I have more than enough clothes to dress my family. 
• EXAMPLE: The house is a mess and I’m exhausted
  SWITCH: I’m grateful to have a home and all the chaos that makes it come alive with love and life. I’m raising a family, not a house. 

Let these switches fuel your gratitude & boost your confidence and productivity.

2. Practice Mindfulness

Instead of focusing on EVERYTHING you “have to get done,” shift your focus more WHO you want to show up as, and what kind of energy you bring into each situation. Allow yourself to be fully aware and present and in the moment. I taught my 6-year-old this concept when she was about 3, so I know you can do it!

Close your eyes, take deep breaths, feel your pulse, and focus on each of your five senses one at a time: sight, smell, hearing, taste, and touch. Root yourself in your body as a way to get out of your head. Take deep breaths & envision the oxygen being sent to your brain, which literally has the ability to soothe the part responsible for causing anxiety, and calms your stress response.

3. Take a Break

Give yourself a much-needed time out, and just walk away from the trigger. Yes… even if it’s your crying baby. Put them somewhere safe like their crib and walk out of the room so you can catch your breath and do steps 1 & 2. Often we just need a change in perspective before you can move forward. Even changing the scenery by taking a quick walk can provide a shift in your mental, emotional, or physical state. Get some fresh air! Doing so will allow you to possibly see your situation from fresh eyes & renewed energy once you’ve had some space.

4. EXERCISE

When you’re already feeling overwhelmed, I’m sure this is the LAST thing you feel you have time to do. However…. an influx of endorphins brought on by getting your heart rate up actually calms your body’s reactionary stress response! As a busy woman/mama, getting to the gym or a class isn’t always an option. Which is why I host Virtual Wellness/ Fitness accountability groups with streaming workouts you can do any time of the day. Some are as short as 10 minutes! From yoga, high-intensity interval training (HIIT), kickboxing, and weights, you can stop where ever you are and stream a workout, break a sweat and get back to business.

LEARN MORE ABOUT ACCESSING MY VIRTUAL WELLNESS COMMUNITY & WORKOUTS HERE. 

5. Delegate

Is anyone else’s favorite phrase “I got it?” I’m a chronic/recovering do-it-yourselfer. I’ve even gone as far as to re-clean my house after paying someone to come do it for me! In truth, I’m still recovering from the “do everything myself” mentality, but I’ve learned that I am most successful when I have a support team. If you’re like me and work from home getting help with some housework, or asking your spouse to pick up something ready-made one night a week from Whole Foods could help.

Trust me, delegation is NOT my personal strong suit, but the more and more I do it, the less overwhelm I experience. Your time is valuable you should be spending it doing things that are going to help you achieve the happiest life you can have. Build a support system, especially of people that love and excel at the things that you don’t, and call on it to get you through.

6. Be Realistic

You can’t do it all. I repeat: you CAN NOT do it all. At least not all on your own. Don’t try to maintain or uphold unrealistic expectations. We all have the same 24 hours in the day and if you constantly feel like they aren’t being used in a way that is helping you make traction toward your goals, it’s time to make cuts! Don’t let one of your cuts be taking care of you. Sleep (yes, I’m talking to you fellow moms with newborns), exercise, healthy food, time working on you (mind, body, soul), and time with your loved ones fuels you.

Delegate or ask for help to do the “other” stuff—even if it’s hard to trust that another person will take care of things as well as you will. When you’re overwhelmed, you have to let go of some amount of control in order to find relief! I’m nodding my head right now to acknowledge I need to take my own advice on this step more.

7. Make a Plan

I used to be such a planner. Then I became a mom. Now God just laughs at any of my “plans.” Ha!  However, even though I know that any plan I make needs to incorporate a certain amount of flexibility, I find I’m far less stressed if I take a few minutes every Sunday and then another few minutes before I go to bed each night create a plan for my week/day.

Each person is different in how they like to plan. I’m a “put it on my computer and link to my phone with alarms” kinda gal, but know LOTS of mamas who love taking the time to make a Happy Planner. Having a plan helps me have focus when I’m feeling scattered.

TIP: don’t put EVERYTHING you need to get done on one day’s to-do list. Instead, pick only a few activities each day that you are confident you can get done. Then you will feel more accomplished and confident when you can cross them off. Take big projects and take a bite out of them day by day.